So, I've been away awhile. I think I got discouraged. I honestly can't remember. A lot's happened. I finally left my club. I didn't realize how crappy it was until I got to the club I'm at now.
It reminds me of home. No, seriously, it reminds me of the club I used to love working at back home, before all the churches in town signed a petition and put us all out of business. (They thought we were bringing rapists and murderers into town. Turns out, something else was bringing rapists and murderers into town, and now their jails are overflowing, their police force is overwhelmed, and we're all long gone. So I guess it wasn't our fault after all.)
But, yeah. I'm at a good club. I don't know the best way to describe it, but the atmosphere is completely different when you step through the front doors. There isn't a panicked, frenetic sense of urgency as strippers run from customer to customers: "Would you like a dance? No?" Next customer. "Would you like a dance? No?" Next customer.
It's very relaxed and pleasant here. Everyone's friendly. No one seems to be drowning under the weight of all their stress. The girls are earning enough money that they aren't all on the verge of nervous breakdowns because none of them can pay their bills. The rules are very fair, and easy to follow. The clientele is generally very pleasant to work with. In a nutshell, I've landed in a good place and I'm very happy.
Except, that I'm probably not going to stay for very long.
Because I'm pregnant.
My husband and I decided around December that it was time to start trying for a baby. Statistically, it takes about 80% of couples roughly half a year to conceive. That gives my husband a nice bit of time to hunt for a really good job, so I can take time off work to get as round as a barrel and, hopefully, pop out a kid.
Two months later, I was pregnant. My husband is now scrambling for a job, and I'm very soon going to be kissing my wonderful new workplace goodbye. At least temporarily. I should probably crack a joke about pregnant strippers here. Can't think of any at the moment. Too bad.
Anyway, life's good right now. My best guess is that I'm at the eight week mark, however, I could be way off. The doctor will confirm it for us tomorrow. Hopefully. I've been having some pretty bad luck with the medical field lately. Let's call it a severe case of Murphy's Law of Medicine. If it could go wrong, it has gone wrong. I imagine I'll be posting more on that, tomorrow after my doctor's visit.
Still, I'm (mostly) healthy. I'm not on any drugs or medications. I'm eating healthy foods. I had a bowl of blueberries for breakfast this morning. Last night when I got home from work, I had a sauteed head of broccoli. Lunch might be egg drop soup. I'm trying to think positive thoughts, and avoiding both stress and caffeine. And the urge to bite someone's head off. I really need figure out ways to deal with the mood swings.
I really had no idea what mood swings were. People talk about mood swings. I was a teenager once. I was moody. I kept it all together. Pregnancy is the same thing, right? No. No, it is not. Must... resist... urge... to... shriek. Granted, on the bright side, most of the times I've wanted to scream, it's been stuff that would make ordinary people want to scream, too. Mostly. And it's not like I have screamed even though I wanted to. Mostly.
Food has gained a whole new level of awesome, and I can't seem to keep myself awake. My energy zaps out a lot faster than it used to. I've been scavenging the internet for every money-saving parenting trick I can find. (Cloth diapers. Styles and brand comparisons. The all-in-one diaper? Or maybe the flat diaper with a cover? Home-sewn diapers can be really cute or really ugly depending upon the skill of the sewer. Can I even get my old sewing machine to work?)
I think I've been so busy trying to brace myself for impact, that it really hasn't registered in my brain that my (hopefully) future offspring will be cute. Or endearing. Or lovable. Right now it's just an expense I have to prepare for, and a responsibility that I have to live up to. (Eat healthy foods, avoid cigarette smoke. And stress.)
I'm very excited, but in the "I just got hired for a new job" sense of things.
